Nightmare

I saw him from afar, one glimpse thinking he was a figment of my imagination. I couldn't believe my eyes, he stood strong and tall with the promise of forever in his eyes.

I thought it was a trick of light when he looked across the room and smiled at me, my heart melted to the floor in puddles around my feet.

Eyes of gold, skin of caramel, smile of light and walk of lust he was everything from my dreams, he was everything from any woman's dream and he walked to me.

I stopped breathing, who needs air when God was bringing heaven on feet my way, I didn't even want to blink for fear that he might disappear.

Steady walking towards me, still smiling, in my head I'm thinking of something witty to say something that will capture and keep his attention.

I just wanted his light to shine on me and I wanted to be the star in his show, the main actress that out shined any other actress he may have thought of giving the staring role to.

I am thinking, and watching him walk and loving his smile and swimming in the depth of his eyes and slowly I answer his smile with a smile of my own I want to walk towards him but I stay put.

As he nears where I am standing I notice that his eyes are not focused, what could that mean is he having second thoughts about talking to me.

I have even thought of something to say like hello my name is, no that's not what I had in mind, it was more like you light up my life will you marry me, that sounds about right

Then I hear hello, but not from the future father of my children, from a voice a lot like mine and as I turn to look behind me he answers with a hello of his own.

It clicks all at once, the casting of shadows, the slip of my smile, and as they embrace I pick up my heart and walk away.

Painful Escape

Love is blind, yea that's what she said, love is blind and despite the fact that she knew this she still stayed.


Hungry some nights, bleeding and desolate she still stayed


Through the false "I love you's" and the painful hello's she still stayed.


Bloody noses caused by hands not of love, hospital stays just to get away for a day or two and yet...


One day on a blue train going to no where I'll get away, she says, away from bruising hands and bitter words, I'll escape.


No chance, it's not possible because now her belly grows with his seed, she's trapped.


"Can't get out now." she says what about baby he matters more than anything now, but with baby the pain subsides for a while.


He's here and beautiful, she cries, knowing that the break in pain is coming to an end and still she stays


Love volunteers to help her get away but fear has her trapped, fear and baby, so she declines.


There is no choice


He goes to far, bleeding, crying for help, there's no one but beautiful baby. Fear takes hold but she welcomes the end.


Baby screams, he screams, he cries, he cries, there is silence only her own.

Hush baby hush, mommy is gone now, she has gone at last the only way she knew how.

I am

This is where I'm at, two worlds within a world doubting my gifts and questioning myself.
I know who I am, don't know what I want, spent the majority of my time trying to please other people and not me.
Giving and hurting and loving more than I should but I know this is me, I'm real to who I am, still don't know what I want
So here I am, two worlds within one world, struggling to make since of this journey, left in a hollow shell with no goals, no forsight.
I don't love and I won't love, thats what I live with, and I want the freedom of just going through life accordingly.

But my soul is left empty, rotting in the dirt from B.C and growth stunted AC, here I am.
I want to love and not hurt, to breathe without my heart shuttering from the pain I always expected.
Pain that is always dealt in harsh blows till my ribs cave in and lungs fail, till I'm left on life support.
Now I'm tired because abuse has been the existance of me, throroughly, and I am left to cause distruction in my path.
I am who I am, ever changing, evolving or faultering, heart hurting soul left in tatters on the floor crying save me  save me because I know there is more.

Me singing

So I decided to play with my webcam graphics and ended up recording a song. I love music, anyone who knows me knows that its a big part of who I am. I have that weirdness and dramatic personality that almost every artist has lol. So since I have been vibing I decided to put this video up. If anyone decides to follow me feel free to leave a comment and tell me what you think.

Infinite Sex

Can you make me scream?

Do you know all there is to know?

What spots to hit.

What parts to kiss.

Can you imagine the thoughts evoked?

By the way you walk.

The way you talk.

Your hands on my hips.

Tongue in my lips.

Are you thinking fo me right now?

Did I make you drip?

Let my voice illicit.

You know you want it.

Talk to me.

Tell me your secrets.

I can show you things illegal in a bedroom in 50 states.

First kiss me.

Ill hold thee.

Rub hands down my spine.

Ill rub my hands down your.....

Use your imagination.

You can reach your heights.

Make me oooo.

Ill give you ahhhh.

Climbing walls.

Yelling calls.

I wish you were here to give me what I see.

Minds eye rigid.

With what I'm missing.

Making legs tremble.

Hands fumble.

With me, with myself, I feel you.

Higher and higher still.

Till the ceiling blurs.

Till fingers lock.

Throat closes.

Cream Spills.

Lets do this again, next time I want you to watch.

Lost Girl

(Ive been dreaming about this poem for some time and I'm sure its not finished but i felt like if i didn't put it down i would loose it. So here it is for anyone who actually pays attention....)

Lost girl walking slowly eyes traveling with your feet, why are sad eyes boring into pavement? Maybe hoping that it will eat you alive.

Sad girl with heart full of pain and tears full of lies you wont have to feel anymore, keep your dream world surrounding you until it becomes reality.

Why wont you live for you and not let others define you and break you into little pieces giving them the chance to define you.

You can make it lost girl, you can rise up until ashes become a fire for life again, until its easier to breath, until the hurt is a distant memory, rise!

Lost girl with no sense of your spirit, no clue what you are made of, break free of the chains that bind you, break free of the life that once held you, wounded and bleeding, the frustration of repeated history.

Carry forth the strength of your ancestors, let their light from heaven shine through you so that you might inspire your soul to rise.

Be who you want to be and not what they want you to be, take back the strength born inside since conception, tap into it, manifest it within life so that its not to much to move forward.

Lost girl where is your pride? Proud people don't walk with their heads down, they don't shed tears over transgressions committed by other humans with their false intentions.

Don't give you away to those who would make it simple for your eyes to follow your feet in shame of nothing that can't be fixed or forgiven.

Respect earned not given can't taint images of good intentions leaving hollow holes where love or friendship took root and grew to be diminished, disfigured.

Girl make dreams reality, make fear non existent, make tears a choice, make life worth living, make joy mandatory, make peace where there is none, make love and have fun, make the past a lost thought, make the future hopeful, make a friend everywhere you go, make your heart an objective, make your eyes touch the sky and give your feet a mind of their own.

My Thoughts

I can not believe that I have been writing on this blog for such a long time. I feel like it was yesterday when I started pouring my heart out so that other people can see into my head. Im not the most complicated person in the world just thought I was interesting. Lol guess not. But its ok, I will keep pouring my heart out and maybe someone will gain inspiration from what I say or maybe even get a little hot from the erotic thoughts "from pen to paper." One Luv

Lust

Pen to paper trying to release the pent up lust inside of me becaue the images haunting my mind are blocking my normal thought process.
Chocolate and male, he invades my thoughts, not a figment of my imagination but warm blooded built like an athlete, strong, he invades my senses.
The only way to get him out of my head is to put pen to paper and write out my fantasies, from multiple orgasms to gentle caresses he consumes me.
Even his voice which can penatrate my skin makes me wet and seeing him everyday doesnt make it easy, if he is not visable his presence is undeniable.
He doesnt even see me but if he could invision the thoughts and feelings running through me I would intrigue him, Im sure, make him wonder if the physical could out do the mental.
And still I think of him between my thighs and I anticipate what will never be, guess its my way of making it through the day, but it doesnt stop my legs from trembling with just a thought.
To bad he doesn't know....

My Fantasy

You are my fantasy, sculpted like a figure out of ancient times, your body can make a nun wet and want to renounce her vows. But you're a fantasy, only to be touched with the critical eye and dreamed about with a lustful mind. The dream can be sensual with thoughts of pleasure with tongue, teeth, lips and trembling hands grasping at muscles and soft flesh. You are my fantasy and I can explore every part of your being with my minds eye. No, I don't believe in love at first sight that is just a trick of light. I believe that I am meant to caress your body with my hands. I believe I am meant to grind my hips on top of you till you cry my name. I believe I am meant to feel your hard length to the depths of my soul. I don't think like this and I don't talk like this on a regular, but this is where thoughts of you take me. Heart beating, palms sweating, lips massaging, hands exploring, orgasms exploding, wetness trickles down my inner thigh and all of this is with just one thought of you. This is what you do to my mind and body with mental images swimming around my temporal lobe. You are my fantasy, destined to be tasted only once and longed for by the body. Captivating my senses with just a look, mocha skin making my mouth water. Chocolate is relief to my taste buds, its my only satisfaction because you are a forbidden taste, but I know you taste just like chocolate. Flavor invades my lips, wanting it to be tasted by lower lips, I feel you. Can I, just for one night, find your soft spot and delve my tongue into each and every dip you posses and ooh how facial hair rubbing my inner thigh can stimulate every nerve ending I have. Soft music, candlelight, fruit strategically placed, this is how I see you, this is where I want you. You are my fantasy only to be tasted once and dreamed about throughout time and I will you know. Dream about all of the positions and sensations that could be a part of who we are. I want to be lost inside of you as if we are one and not in the forever sense, just in an erotic sense. Make my legs quake with full thrusts and hit my spot on every downward stroke. I want this, no, I need this because without this I exist on a plain of unfulfilled desires that can be quenched only by you. I don't want you to be my soul mate, I just want you to shake my soul till all that's left of me is a shell. Intimacy, the ultimate destination and I want you to ride with me on the road to ecstasy. You can bring this to me lover, sensuality personified, you have me. You are my fantasy captivating all that I am set forth in a trance, turned into a feign. You are....

Y.O.U

I thought about you all day today, erotic thoughts swimming around in my rising tide of desire. I dreamed as if I felt you a million times before. I dreamed your hand ran along the peaks and valleys of my body as an explorer of many foreign lands. You heightened my passion with whisper soft kisses in my most sensitive places and my throat went dry from trying to hold back inevitable cries of ecstasy. I felt you as I have never felt you before as your tongue played Beethoven's 9Th symphony in E flat and my body sang the song of a siren in love for the first time. You made me feel, and it was so amazing I had to squeeze my legs tightly above my sensitive bud of love and shut my eyes so that no one around could see the lust there dilating my pupils so that the grey flecks shone bright like brilliant stars in a far away galaxy. As I sat there eyes closed, thighs tight, body trembling ever so slightly, I tumbled into the deepest of the great blue ocean. I clamped my teeth together to prevent the cry of rapture that was threatening to fall from my lips as a single tear trickled down my cheek. As the clouds obstructing my vision faded away a smile spread across my face and slowly my legs parted and my mind came back to the here and now, I thought about what I would say if you asked me how my day was. I can show you better than I can tell you of my thoughts about you today.

Lost and Alone

So I met someone I thought myself in love with. Why would I think that when I have never felt worthy of any kind of love from a man. I have friends and family that tell me I'm attractive but for some reason men dont see what they see. I think its because they love who I am and they are supportive of what type of person I am. I love my friends and family for that. But anyway back to what i was saying I met someone who doesnt like my outer appearance but he loves me as a person. I dont want that I want the person who is interested in me to be attracted to me. I know im not the best looking person but there has to be something about my outer that makes up for all of the outer. I really am not going to say I dont care about him but i feel like he is pulling away from me now because even though he feels like I am what he needs I know that I am not what he wants. For me that is the worst thing for someone to tell you because then you always feel like you are not good enough. I dont want to be around someone who makes me feel like I am lucky to be with them. Shouldnt they feel like they are happy to be with me and vice versa. I shouldnt feel like I am lucky to be with them and they shouldnt feel like they are lucky to be with me. It should just be a mutual happiness that the person brings to you. I have cried and screamed and died slowly from the inside dealing with this man because I care about him so much and I have never felt for anyone how i feel for him and it hurts so much that Im not good enough for him and why because he is not perfect. I think its time for me to move on because I can tell things have changed. I just wish that I didnt feel like crap about it. I have always been able to guard my heart with these types of things but I did open up to him and now im crushed. Stupid me for believing that someone could actually care for me. I guess my prediction from early in life was correct ...I am meant to be alone. I guess you can say right now that I am broken hearted but what can I do I think I am just not even gonna try anymore. I am so tired of men not looking at me as anything of value. Im done!

Sad Love Story

When we met I knew you were the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, your charm was hypnotizing.
As time has gone on my feelings have gotten stronger and I cant hide them anymore.
I have always wished for a man like you to come along and be my friend maybe even my lover, then one day you introduced me to her and my dreams were shattered.
You told me she was the one you have been waiting for, the woman of your dreams.
You told me you don't know how you survived all of these years without her in your life.
You told me that now you are complete and every breath feels like springtime.
I told you I know what you mean because I feel the same way about you.
Now I am in a predicament because all I have wanted to do is tell you everything that is in my heart.
That heart is now left bleeding with no chance of relief from a pain so deep that my soul is left shaking.
How can you tell me you love her so much, know those feelings deep down inside and not see them in my eyes.
You told me she was the one you have been waiting for, the woman of your dreams.
You told me you don't know how you survived all of these years without her in your life.
You told me that now you are complete and every breath feels like springtime.
I told you I know what you mean because I feel the same way about you.
My story is common not so foreign to me, it seems like any man I have ever loved doesn't see inside of me.
Its possible that I haven't found the one true love meant for me or its possible that I am meant to walk life's roads alone.
So this is how the story ends I am left alone again wanting a man that will never be mine wanting what is not to be mine.
You told me she was the one you have been waiting for, the woman of your dreams.
You told me you don't know how you survived all of these years without her in your life.
You told me that now you are complete and every breath feels like spring time.
I told you I know what you mean because I feel the same way about you.
Is it possible for you to choose me?

My Pen

Time stood still outside of my hour glass so I decided to write.
I was told that writing was a cowards way out but to me its freedom.
I can live the life I have chosen through my pen turning words into memories of times never shared but remembered in my subconscious wanting.
I just let the words and the metaphors live inside my soul until I'm ready to let them spring forth from my pen and give life to creation.
With my pen and paper I feel like God's child speaking that which is not into existence.
With my pen I can scratch out past atrocities reborn of pain as if that section of my life never existed.
While my pen is given free rain I can imagine my flesh and organs on the sunny beaches of Brazil making my caramel skin bronze and revealing freckles on my nose.
I am given future happiness through my pen baring me children and a husband that don't currently exist.
My pen gives me away to beat down the ultimate enemy making God ruler of all in his kingdom and in his people.
Heavens gates open wide for me because I let my spoken words on paper reveal my true heart to God the only way that I know how through this pen.
I know that I have the strength to make it through the hard times with my soul running free across pages of times.
I have the spirit of an angel ready to receive her wings and take flight throughout this crazy world and create peace where there is none.
I am not a spoken word artist I am a poet and I am able to make wishes come true with just the flick of my wrist, some ink and a sheet of paper.

Lost and Found

Ok I have a tagged page and my ID is lyricalqt.tagged.com. I used to go on there all of the time until my computer broke. I usually don't do dating websites but I figured since I have no life why not meet some interesting men...right? Wrong! I should have never wasted my time. Some of the men on that site are so crazy it is almost scary but I guess you really can't expect more from a dating website. I was thinking maybe I should look for a man since I can't get any to approach me but that was my mistake because doesn't the word say that a MAN that findeth a wife findeth a good thing. I kept thinking why cant my man find me already! I am trying to wait for my husband before I have sex again but let me tell you about frustration...I haven't caved in but since there hasn't been an abundance of men at my door I really haven't been tested. I am 27 and I have had 2 men in my life, let me rephrase that I have had 1 man and 1 boy in my life and middle school doesn't really count. :) Maybe all of the romance novels I read have put thoughts into my head that are impossible or maybe God forgot to design someone for me or maybe the one God designed for me has decided that he is gay...it happens. I honestly don't know what to think but each year I am alone, more crazy thoughts come to my head. This year it was...maybe the man God designed for me doesn't find me attractive, but that's crazy right, because if God designed someone for me then he would find me attractive. I'm so scared to be alone for the rest of my life that I even thought about talking to the next man that comes my way and just having his kids and getting married and all of that stuff but then I think about all of those fears I have about not loving the man I'm with and I quickly change my mind. If I had to pick a theme song for how I feel right now it would be Lost & Found by Ledisi and here are the words...

Always alone someone come for me

Here on my own feels like the pain lasts an eternityTears come no more I wanna smile againLove againPlease someone find me Souls pass me by why can't they see me hereTouch me one time, just like magic I will re-appearSadness like the rain it showers over meI wanna feel againPlease someone find meLost not yet found, breathing in miseryHope looks around when will the sun ever shine on me?I need love to come and carry meTake me awayPlease someone find me I'll sing my song, maybe I'll scream and shoutPlease someone come I don't wanna live without loveHear my plea I have love to give I wanna livePlease someone find me.

You know I really can't decide which thing scares me the most, living without love or loving and losing my heart.

Mother Lee

Recently we had a very important member of our church pass away. Most people considered her to be an angel on earth, which would be very accurate, but in my normal selfish way I considered her to be my own personal savior. She was the person I could always cry to and cry on when things in my life just would not add up. Its so hard now going to church on Sunday and just seeing pictures of her everywhere and not seeing her smiling face. She was the "mother" of the church, she was the pastors wife, and she was the constant source or energy and light in that church. I never thought in a million years that I would have to go to church and not see her sitting in her corner. So in the mist of my sadness I did what I know how to do best...I wrote a poem and its appropriately entitled Mother Lee.....

God called you home to be with him because there were no angels in heaven like you.

Your warm smile and secure embrace was needed to help all the other angels make it through the day.

While you were here we were blessed to have you in our lives but now you are gone so we must say goodbye.

I never thought that there would be a time when we would have to see you go but I was glad to have you near because I loved you so.

You helped me get through some difficult times in my life by telling me I can make it as long as I have god in my life and on my side.

I feel you were my own personal angel sent here to earth to see me through and then you were chosen to go back to heaven because you were tried and true.

I hope to touch as many lives as you did in this life and I know one day if i do like God needs me to I will see you on the other side.

Music and a soundtrack phrase...

Yesterday I was talking to some people about the phrase "Music is the Soundtrack to my Life. "If you really think about it, Music can't really be a soundtrack to anyone's life theoretically speaking. If you look at the definition of soundtrack this is what it says.

sound·track also sound track (soundtrk)
n.
1. The narrow strip at one side of a movie film that carries the sound recording.
a. The music that accompanies a movie.
b. A commercial recording of such music.

OK so maybe our life can be considered as a film or a movie because we do have a little bit of everything, don't we? Breaking it down, we have drama, which consists of haters, fights with friends and nosy parents. Then we have action which involves fist fights, burning yourself with the hot iron and riding the tallest roller coaster in the world. We also have romance which is the same story for just about everyone...boy meets girl, boy gets girl, boy dumps girl for the Blondie slut across the street from you...how common. Your life can even consist of a little bit of porn depending on how much of a freak you are. I wouldn't know anything about that, of course, but I know some people who might ;). If I were to rephrase that phrase, however, I would say something along the lines of "Music provides the soundtrack for my life." That is, if I were to be logically correct about what music means and what it means to me. I would make it my focal point by saying that it provides rather than it is. I mean think of the definition of music...

mu·sic : /myuz-k/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[myoo-zik] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun
1.an art of sound in time that expresses ideas and emotions in significant forms through the elements of rhythm, melody, harmony, and color.
2.the tones or sounds employed, occurring in single line (melody) or multiple lines (harmony), and sounded or to be sounded by one or more voices or instruments, or both.
3.musical work or compositions for singing or playing.
4.the written or printed score of a musical composition.
5.any sweet, pleasing, or harmonious sounds or sound

The definition shows that music is more of an expression then a person, place or a thing. I would think of music as more of an adjective then a noun. I believe that it can describe a person, place or thing more than it can be a person, place or a thing. OK so maybe you can't say exactly... I feel like music today. I feel like an element of sound. But it doesn't sound any better to say that I went to music today and found my peace of mind. I just feel like that's what people are saying when they use the phrase "Music is the Soundtrack to my life." So I will coin the new phrase "Music provides the soundtrack for my life." Which really makes more sense anyway.

Work, Work, Work

I want my own apartment but this job is really wearing me thin. Sometimes I get tired of talking to people on the phone all day but this is my job. I haven't been doing to well either. My attendance here shows. I mean if you think back to when I started here over 2 years ago. Back in the day we had free lunch and breakfast, we had online access to a lot of things that we don't have access to anymore, we had so much more freedom then what we have now. But now lunch can cost a min of $7 and we don't have access to anything but email and these blogs, which will probably go away in a matter of time. I thought I just needed a break or vacation that's why I went to go see my brother in Washington because I figured I can kill 2 birds with one stone go for my nephews first birthday and go to get a break from this place. Man this job has really gone down hill and its all in an effort to save money. Next thing you know they are going to be cutting positions and pay. I really have to give my position some thought because if I leave now then I have to wait 90 days at a new job to go on my trips but if I stick it out here then I can go on my trips this year and start looking for something different next year. All of the things that made this job appealing are no longer available. At least I actually like the people I work with and I don't have to clean rooms. :)

The One

I have never been the one to believe in fairy tales being the realist that I am but I can finally admit to myself that I want my prince charming to sweep me away and love me forever.

I know ... sad Huh?

I have come to the conclusion that no matter how much of a realist I am I still cry when someone finds true love and happiness at the end of a movie or a book.

Some times my imagination can run wild and I can see his face, feel his heartbeat, touch his skin, breath his scent, learn his body, kiss his lips and sense his soul.

Who? you might ask, well my true love of course

The only man in this world that can hold me tight like he wants to squeeze my breath away, he has the strength to crush my ribs, but is so gentle that I feel secure and treasured at the same time.

The one man who's kisses make me weak in the knees and he is content with just making me weak in the knees for the rest of our lives.

He is not perfect but neither am I and though our flaws can make us angry at each other sometimes our flaws, his and mine, can be attractive and endearing.

My man is a man in the truest sense of the word, as a matter of fact he is so much of a man, he is not ashamed of following God and will say "baby lets pray" even when I don't feel like praying.

He knows that tomorrow is not promised so he loves God and prays and loves me enough to hold on to what he has.

He loves me so much he is more concerned about my health then the way I look and is willing to help me improve and not only does he worship my body he takes care of his.

His intellect along with his bedroom eyes turn me on the most and when I am in his arms we don't have to talk because he is happy just to hold me.

In a world so plagued with divorce and separated marriages, he is my soul mate and the only one that makes me whole and he is fine with that because he will never want anyone else in his bed or his heart.

He works so that he can support his future family and he is just old fashioned enough to want me to stay home with the children and be a house wife but he is just new schooled enough to want a woman that is goal oriented.

I have never met this man but I want this man, he has the characteristics of the man of my dreams and I know there is alot more to a man then what I have described.

So I leave the rest in God's hands because even though I know what I want in a man God knows what I need from a man, My soul mate.

It's my Birthday!

Its my birthday again and because I dont want to and you have probably seen it on my myspace page anyway I wont tell you my age. I feel good about this year although I was trying to stay my previous age for another year it is definatly a blessing to be here another year. I love the fact that God cares enough about me to say that she can still do something on this earth maybe to help someone or maybe to change someones life or to be someones wife.


I still have hope that there is someone out there for me and because my heart has been broken so many times at such a young age I didnt know how to handle it. Now I feel like I am more mature and whatever God brings my way I am ready for the challenge. Life is full of ups and downs anyway and if you dont have them then you are not living. I have had a good birthday so far. I have gotten so much love its unbelievable and I cant believe that God has blessed me with people who care enough to leave messeges and give presents. Its a beautiful thing. Thank you lord for loving me enough to make sure that my day is blessed with love and joy. I hope that many people can have a birthday as blessed as mine and people in your life that love you like I do. You know when I was a kid material things were the most important thing but now that I am older I see that my salvation and the love of people around me is much more important. See! I told you this year was gonna be my year!

My Freedom

I was inspired to fly to the sky where the birds sing a happy song of praise to God all day long.

I cant explain the freedom that comes from being in the air, how my wings take flight and gives my heart joy like lemonade on a 110 degree day in Arizona.

I was given a sort of peace that I cant usually find on this earth and I have thoughts in my mind that could have given a slave the salvation and focus they needed to escape those who were only willing to see them as prisoners.

Before I took flight I was a prisoner of the mentality that many people have of what a person is supposed to be how a person is supposed to react or respond to their close minded philosophy.

Thank God that he gave me individuality because I don't know how I would survive among ignorance or how I would react if someone actually tried to change who I am.

I was inspired to fly to the sky where the birds sing a happy song of praise to God all day long.

I cant believe that I have been picked to be this beautiful creature as a reincarnation of my spirit man and it feels so good that God thought of me when he changed me from woman to animal.

See I was once a living being singing my song for all of the world to hear but no one would listen and so I was forced to change into something I am not so that my voice would be heard and therefore I sold out.

But now in the sky as I fly high above the clouds I am forced to be a me for all of the world to see and I am no longer pushed to be caged by societies image of me.

And now that I am me I can give my praises all day long which is what I have always wanted to do any way so that God can listen and never forget his child.

Even though I am here in this place that I always wanted to be in I don't know what song to sing but I know that its important to know what I am singing for.

I am singing for all those that don't have a voice and I am singing to right the wrong that is in my past so that it will never come back to haunt me in the best stagings of my life.

I am giving light and flight to all that is beyond my reach so that it can be fixed without tears, just joy and moving forward will be the only option for me and those around me.

I was given this gift so that I can flow through your world like a melody and be back where I am supposed to be, on the ground and no longer free.

Birds have everything that I am and now that I was inspired to fly to the sky where the birds sing a happy song of praise to God all day long I can just be.